The moment the bedroom door cracked open, I shut my eyes tightly, facing the opposite direction. I couldn't tell how long I'd been lying there, but I knew it'd been a while before Matthew finally followed me home. My heart raced faster than ever before, unable to confront him just yet. The confession he'd spilled to me at the office was more than I could handle at that moment, especially after Lex had been taken away from me. I almost had him in my grasp and I let him slip right through my fingers again...
"Jamie? Are you awake?" His whisper was surprisingly calm, like nothing ever happened. Not only was it chilling, but at the same time it soothed me like always. I let him repeat with hesitation before I finally turned around just as he slid under the sheets next to me. I waited half a beat before venturing. "How long were you home?" Matthew turned to me and smiled wryly. "About an hour or so..." I nodded before propping myself on an elbow, Matthew slowly sliding down to rest his head on a pillow. "I shouldn't have told you, but I knew if I didn't I'd regret it. Looks like I'll be regretting it no matter what." The spiteful tone of his voice stung me deep inside. Was I the one to blame, though? "Seeing you with him made me realize how much I want that with you, Jamie. I've never seen so much love for someone as I did tonight."
I wanted to shut him up, to tell him I couldn't take it, but the better part of me - the listener that I was - wanted him to continue... to just let it all out. "I never told you about my marriage, did I? I married my high school sweetheart right after graduation. We both attended the same college, both became successful therapists... but then I found out she was pregnant. I was ecstatic, but she panicked. Everything started to go downhill after that. I came home one day and she was just... gone. No note, no phone call, not even the slightest warning. She just decided to leave. I haven't seen or spoken to her since, and I don't expect to any time soon. I suppose we weren't on the same page at that point in our lives." He resituated himself and rested his back against the headboard of the bed, my expression screaming the confusion I couldn't comprehend. "Everything wonderful about you reminds me of her, Jamie. I'm afraid if I lose you, I'll lose her all over again."
My hand gently cupped his cheek, forcing him to look at nothing but me. "Why didn't you tell me this before, Matthew? Why did you wait until now?" He shrugged his shoulders limply, his eyes dropping to my lips. "I thought I'd have all the time in the world to tell you. I'm sorry. Would it have made a difference if I had?" Oh God, would it have? I bit my bottom lip with uncertainty. "Who knows?" Matthew sighed through his nose, turning his attention to the foot of the bed. "What are you going to do? I'm not expecting you to stay here much longer, but I'd like you to stick around for a few more days." I nodded and removed my hand from his cheek, resting it on his chest instead. "I have to see him, even if it's for the last time." I returned my head to the pillow beneath me, my eyes setting on his profile. "You won't lose me, Matthew. I promise."
He glanced down at me, a sad smile forming on his thin lips. "Promises are made to be broken."
Baby, tell me how can this be wrong?
Grant my last request and just let me hold you,
don't shrug your shoulders, lay down beside me.
Sure I can accept that we're going nowhere,
but one last time let's go there... lay down beside me.
"Jamie? Are you awake?" His whisper was surprisingly calm, like nothing ever happened. Not only was it chilling, but at the same time it soothed me like always. I let him repeat with hesitation before I finally turned around just as he slid under the sheets next to me. I waited half a beat before venturing. "How long were you home?" Matthew turned to me and smiled wryly. "About an hour or so..." I nodded before propping myself on an elbow, Matthew slowly sliding down to rest his head on a pillow. "I shouldn't have told you, but I knew if I didn't I'd regret it. Looks like I'll be regretting it no matter what." The spiteful tone of his voice stung me deep inside. Was I the one to blame, though? "Seeing you with him made me realize how much I want that with you, Jamie. I've never seen so much love for someone as I did tonight."
I wanted to shut him up, to tell him I couldn't take it, but the better part of me - the listener that I was - wanted him to continue... to just let it all out. "I never told you about my marriage, did I? I married my high school sweetheart right after graduation. We both attended the same college, both became successful therapists... but then I found out she was pregnant. I was ecstatic, but she panicked. Everything started to go downhill after that. I came home one day and she was just... gone. No note, no phone call, not even the slightest warning. She just decided to leave. I haven't seen or spoken to her since, and I don't expect to any time soon. I suppose we weren't on the same page at that point in our lives." He resituated himself and rested his back against the headboard of the bed, my expression screaming the confusion I couldn't comprehend. "Everything wonderful about you reminds me of her, Jamie. I'm afraid if I lose you, I'll lose her all over again."
My hand gently cupped his cheek, forcing him to look at nothing but me. "Why didn't you tell me this before, Matthew? Why did you wait until now?" He shrugged his shoulders limply, his eyes dropping to my lips. "I thought I'd have all the time in the world to tell you. I'm sorry. Would it have made a difference if I had?" Oh God, would it have? I bit my bottom lip with uncertainty. "Who knows?" Matthew sighed through his nose, turning his attention to the foot of the bed. "What are you going to do? I'm not expecting you to stay here much longer, but I'd like you to stick around for a few more days." I nodded and removed my hand from his cheek, resting it on his chest instead. "I have to see him, even if it's for the last time." I returned my head to the pillow beneath me, my eyes setting on his profile. "You won't lose me, Matthew. I promise."
He glanced down at me, a sad smile forming on his thin lips. "Promises are made to be broken."
Baby, tell me how can this be wrong?
Grant my last request and just let me hold you,
don't shrug your shoulders, lay down beside me.
Sure I can accept that we're going nowhere,
but one last time let's go there... lay down beside me.
The words made my breath fall short in my throat, a small whimpering sound went up through my chest. I slowly rose my watch, exactly the time I was to be doomed. The part of the wall carrying the dread words burst open and rats started to crawl in, immediatly gnawing at my flesh, I tried to back away, but the part i had opened up suddenly closes and i was trapped in darkness, I was trapped, I was trapped with no hope off escape and a thousand beady eyes crawling all over my body, wrigglin down my chest and making their way towards my heart. I spun and rolled around as much as I could in the small space, but the rats were persistent, and my blood trickeld all around me, forming in a pool under me. After a while a finally gave up. For all I had done i was payed with my own dead, locked in a narrow passage with rats all around me, the last living things i would ever interact with. I began to sob softly and my final breath flew from my body, I was a limp, lifeless corpse.....
Another poem by me. This one came out kinda lame,but I'll let the rating be the judge (assuming there will be any).
That Girl
Have you seen that girl,
That goes around here and there?
Nobody knows where she’s going,
Is she even going somewhere?
Pretty face, pretty hair,
Nobody knows her name,
She seems sad, what a coincidence,
I’ve been feeling the same.
She seems lost,
Doesn’t even know where she’s from,
I’m a nice guy so I invite her,
To stay in my home.
She seats in the couch,
My, is she pretty?
I wonder what I can say,
To comfort that girl , so dreamy.
Sarah,
She tells me it’s her name,
She feels sad,
Funny,
Because I’ve been feeling the same
That Girl
Have you seen that girl,
That goes around here and there?
Nobody knows where she’s going,
Is she even going somewhere?
Pretty face, pretty hair,
Nobody knows her name,
She seems sad, what a coincidence,
I’ve been feeling the same.
She seems lost,
Doesn’t even know where she’s from,
I’m a nice guy so I invite her,
To stay in my home.
She seats in the couch,
My, is she pretty?
I wonder what I can say,
To comfort that girl , so dreamy.
Sarah,
She tells me it’s her name,
She feels sad,
Funny,
Because I’ve been feeling the same