I can't write this anymore.
I feel like its a copy of Avatar the last airbender. And the companions quartet. I never intended on making it like that. But whenever I imagine my characters using their powers I see them bending. I know you are all going to get. mad. Really mad. Really really mad. Really really really really mad. But my stories need more *sparkle*. A better writer with better talent. I think it needs more thought. I think I should create something that is REALLY from my imagination. Thats why, no matter what you all are going to say....
I'm stopping Girl who cried wolf.
I know your gonna hate me. Yea....I really do expect that. But I have a different idea for a new story. It has no title. Thats why I'm going to start posting it here. The first chapter. If you don't like it tell me in a comment. Tell me what you really think about it. Tell the truth. And if you loved Girl who cried wolf SOO MUCH then I will MAYBE.....maybe.....keep writing it.
Here we go. (And sorry again.)
This is my new story. Or idea of it.
Her giant grey eyes were so bright. Oddly they were grey which made it so weird for the fact they were bright. This always stumped me when I was near her. And her mood never really changed either.
She giggled at me. I didn't realize it until she pointed it out to me.
"EOS!!" She giggled at me. Her blond hair glistening in the sunlight. We were running at the top of the temple. I was hoping my father wouldn't be mad that I was running through the castle when I was supposed to have lessons. But he was training the boys. He would never know.
"Eos why are you standing there? You face is so still! Are you thinking off again!!" The girl laughed while stroking her long purple dress. It was a bit too big for her. But everything was on Sarafina, Sara for short. She was so small.
I looked up at her. "Sorry. I dozed off again." I began walking again.
"Have we finished tag?" She asked me.
"I guess so. And anyway-" I stopped. I heard footsteps behind me. WE looked at each other. We knew. Sara smiled and showed her missing teeth. And thats when we screamed in laughter and ran through the door.
We raced down the hall laughing. Behind me my father ran down in his brown leather boots. His chuckle was deep and low. You would expect him to be stern because of it. But as he chased us down the hall laughing with us you knew he was no where near stern.
"Come back here!!" He yelled. He looked funny running down the hall. Other teachers came out of their classrooms. Many laughed as the man with the brown shaggy beard ran down the corridor after two little 7-year-olds. And he wasn't gaining on them.
But then Sara tripped on her long dress. My father tripped over her. She laughed and screamed and all the other teachers hooted along with them. I giggled as my father picked up Sara and fixed her dress.
"What were you two girls doing out of class?" He asked us while kneeling down.
"Uh....." I said while looking at Sara.
"We were....."
But of course my dad already knew. He was truth seeker after all. He can see the truth no matter how hard hard the lie has been dug.
"You were chasing a puppy!?!?" He said with his voice stern. But he couldn't stay mad. He began chuckling.
Sara smiled. "Actually we were hiding it." She reached into the pocket of her dress and pulled out the small black lab she had found outside when we went out to play before lessons started. "My puppy here, Zuka, wanted to come with us." She said.
My father smiled and the astronomy teacher, Lilly spoke as she came to my father's side. "And you would know that of course miss animal whisperer! You are in trouble Missy!"
"Yes grandma!" Sara said laughing. Lilly grabbed Sara's arms and led her to their room in the upper castle.
"And so are you." My father said.
I eyed him, knowing he wouldn't hurt me, he was too kind for that. He picked me up and held me in his arms. And the shining sun from the window called to my ears.
**************************************************
10 years later, Castle of Alenfall:
I wanted to sleep. My eyelids were so heavy. I knew Sara and I should have gone to bed earlier. But the day had been so exciting. I always hated lessons anyway. They were so easy to me. And anyway, there were only three people in the class of sun. Me, keeper of the light, Joshua the Sunshine master, and Lydia, the stubborn know it all who could see one's future by reading the signs the sun rays made.
yea okay my new story sucks as much as the other does. Well I'll hear your comments to know for sure.
Do u want me to stop girl who cried wolf or continue with this?
(and don't say both cuz i make final decision)
Or I could always keep on writing my new thing and THEN let you choose.
I feel like its a copy of Avatar the last airbender. And the companions quartet. I never intended on making it like that. But whenever I imagine my characters using their powers I see them bending. I know you are all going to get. mad. Really mad. Really really mad. Really really really really mad. But my stories need more *sparkle*. A better writer with better talent. I think it needs more thought. I think I should create something that is REALLY from my imagination. Thats why, no matter what you all are going to say....
I'm stopping Girl who cried wolf.
I know your gonna hate me. Yea....I really do expect that. But I have a different idea for a new story. It has no title. Thats why I'm going to start posting it here. The first chapter. If you don't like it tell me in a comment. Tell me what you really think about it. Tell the truth. And if you loved Girl who cried wolf SOO MUCH then I will MAYBE.....maybe.....keep writing it.
Here we go. (And sorry again.)
This is my new story. Or idea of it.
Her giant grey eyes were so bright. Oddly they were grey which made it so weird for the fact they were bright. This always stumped me when I was near her. And her mood never really changed either.
She giggled at me. I didn't realize it until she pointed it out to me.
"EOS!!" She giggled at me. Her blond hair glistening in the sunlight. We were running at the top of the temple. I was hoping my father wouldn't be mad that I was running through the castle when I was supposed to have lessons. But he was training the boys. He would never know.
"Eos why are you standing there? You face is so still! Are you thinking off again!!" The girl laughed while stroking her long purple dress. It was a bit too big for her. But everything was on Sarafina, Sara for short. She was so small.
I looked up at her. "Sorry. I dozed off again." I began walking again.
"Have we finished tag?" She asked me.
"I guess so. And anyway-" I stopped. I heard footsteps behind me. WE looked at each other. We knew. Sara smiled and showed her missing teeth. And thats when we screamed in laughter and ran through the door.
We raced down the hall laughing. Behind me my father ran down in his brown leather boots. His chuckle was deep and low. You would expect him to be stern because of it. But as he chased us down the hall laughing with us you knew he was no where near stern.
"Come back here!!" He yelled. He looked funny running down the hall. Other teachers came out of their classrooms. Many laughed as the man with the brown shaggy beard ran down the corridor after two little 7-year-olds. And he wasn't gaining on them.
But then Sara tripped on her long dress. My father tripped over her. She laughed and screamed and all the other teachers hooted along with them. I giggled as my father picked up Sara and fixed her dress.
"What were you two girls doing out of class?" He asked us while kneeling down.
"Uh....." I said while looking at Sara.
"We were....."
But of course my dad already knew. He was truth seeker after all. He can see the truth no matter how hard hard the lie has been dug.
"You were chasing a puppy!?!?" He said with his voice stern. But he couldn't stay mad. He began chuckling.
Sara smiled. "Actually we were hiding it." She reached into the pocket of her dress and pulled out the small black lab she had found outside when we went out to play before lessons started. "My puppy here, Zuka, wanted to come with us." She said.
My father smiled and the astronomy teacher, Lilly spoke as she came to my father's side. "And you would know that of course miss animal whisperer! You are in trouble Missy!"
"Yes grandma!" Sara said laughing. Lilly grabbed Sara's arms and led her to their room in the upper castle.
"And so are you." My father said.
I eyed him, knowing he wouldn't hurt me, he was too kind for that. He picked me up and held me in his arms. And the shining sun from the window called to my ears.
**************************************************
10 years later, Castle of Alenfall:
I wanted to sleep. My eyelids were so heavy. I knew Sara and I should have gone to bed earlier. But the day had been so exciting. I always hated lessons anyway. They were so easy to me. And anyway, there were only three people in the class of sun. Me, keeper of the light, Joshua the Sunshine master, and Lydia, the stubborn know it all who could see one's future by reading the signs the sun rays made.
yea okay my new story sucks as much as the other does. Well I'll hear your comments to know for sure.
Do u want me to stop girl who cried wolf or continue with this?
(and don't say both cuz i make final decision)
Or I could always keep on writing my new thing and THEN let you choose.
The words made my breath fall short in my throat, a small whimpering sound went up through my chest. I slowly rose my watch, exactly the time I was to be doomed. The part of the wall carrying the dread words burst open and rats started to crawl in, immediatly gnawing at my flesh, I tried to back away, but the part i had opened up suddenly closes and i was trapped in darkness, I was trapped, I was trapped with no hope off escape and a thousand beady eyes crawling all over my body, wrigglin down my chest and making their way towards my heart. I spun and rolled around as much as I could in the small space, but the rats were persistent, and my blood trickeld all around me, forming in a pool under me. After a while a finally gave up. For all I had done i was payed with my own dead, locked in a narrow passage with rats all around me, the last living things i would ever interact with. I began to sob softly and my final breath flew from my body, I was a limp, lifeless corpse.....